Monday, September 25, 2006

Lion's Den @ 4 - 6 o'clock PM

Sometimes I feel like my husband has to walk into a lion's den at the end of the day when he comes home from work. Either we've been so busy that day and the house is messy, or dinner isn't made or the kids have been falling apart . . . and I'm upset about all of it and things aren't peaceful at all. I feel so bad calling him or telling him this when he calls just before he leaves work because I want our house to be a place of peace and rest after a long day at the office. Of course, right now he's in school and has a four day work week and of those 4 days, 3 of them are half days of class although he stays all day to do reading "homework" and writing for the next days of class because he can do it in the calm and quiet there much easier than he can at home. Plus, when he comes home, he can spend time with us and not have to try to fit more work in, although it seems like there's always something else he is doing for work. That's not a complaint, just a fact. Just like, my "work" day never really ends and I don't really have an "end" to my "work week" because there are always things to clean, laundry to do, meals to be made and kids to nurture and care for, oh yeah and diapers to change. : )

Anyway, back to the subject, my goal is that even if the day has been crazy, that when Will walks in the door, things are at least calm, the house is picked up and dinner is close to being done. No, I'm not running to put on a dress and make-up like the list in Good Housekeeping from the 50's, although if I'm still in pajama pants and a sleep shirt by 5 PM I do try to get dressed by the time he walks in, but that usually isn't the case. I just hope it helps his "decompression" time after work so he's not bombarded at home. He's so patient though so I'm not sure if doing all of this really means that much because he deals with the days that are crazy so well, but mostly I think he just likes the heads up if he will be walking into the lion's den when he comes home, just so he knows what to expect. With a toddler and a baby, both boys :) I feel like I'm doing good to just have dinner made. I feel like I'm a pretty organized person too, so I wonder how other people do it without pulling too much hair out. It's so hard to make dinner and have both boys whining or crying or wanting attention because it's the end of the day. I just want to stop and spend time with them, but then I think they should deal with it (well, not the baby), but Charley for sure. Then again, they're more important than a complete meal on time, but Will is more important than them and the meal is for him . . . it goes on and on :)

I've heard other moms complain about those 4 and 5 o'clock hours and how difficult they can be. It's like the kids pick those times to meltdown, and then at 6 they're fine again. How does this work? Are they just waiting for dad to get home? Are they hungry? Are they worn out and just need the physical release of throwing a fit? :) or Do they just want my attention every minute. I wouldn't guess attention because Charley plays by himself so well . . . usually . . . lately he's been a bit clingy and whiny. This just started and I don't know if it's jealousy of time with Ben or what. I spend plenty of time with just him by ourselves during Ben's naptime. I think it's just the age. We'll see. Until then, things will be a little hectic for what hopefully will be only a little while. Although, even when I say they're hectic, I don't think they're as crazy as they could be. I think the fact that I'm tired from nursing Ben through the night just wears me out and makes me feel like things are more out of control than they really are. It makes me emotional. Lately, I feel like I'm wanting to cry about something nearly every day and no, I'm not pregnant. I probably just need to get more sleep. That seems to be a recurring theme of these blogs. :) Well, this has been a full one, so I'll sign off now. Night night or as Will says it with Charley for nighttime prayers, "Please give Charley beautiful dreams, Amen."

1 comment:

Dana said...

somethign i've found that works (and this might be because the kid are older, but it's worth a shot). i do one of two things: put on a video, with a small snack, while i'm making dinner. this would be the only video for the day though, that way they actually want to watch it. OR twenty minutes before dave arrives, i send each kid to room time, sam in his, micah in hers (annabelle just kinda wonders still) and let them know that they may come out when daddy gets home. Something that helps, as far as the house goes, is to set the timer for 15 minutes, grab a laundry basket or two if needed, and pick up all the toys and clutter (putting it in the baskets)from the living room floor and furniture, and kitchen and hallways. if there's still time before your timer goes off, then put away as much as you can, if not, just set the baskets aside until after dinner (or have the kids put away stuff from the basket piles). i swear it makes the hugest difference. the first time i did this, dave walked in and asked if i had just vacuumed cause it looked so clean! the key is to do it farely close to the time he comes home, so that there isn't enough time for the kids to bring out more :) and that's when a video's good distraction.